That's Bizarre

Over the weekend I watched some Arrested Development (again. but not like "Again?...(sigh)... Jesus Christ! Why don't I do something else?!?"...more like "Yay!") and now I can't get the phrase "pan-sexual bizarre" out of my head, so when the lady at Tim Horton's asks me if I ordered a large or an extra-large Cafe Mocha (Extra large...duh.), all I think is "pan-sexual bizarre" and when my boss asks if I had a nice weekend I hear "pan-sexual bizarre" (which it totally wasn't, because I looked up the Wiki definition of the prefix "Pan-" and it means "all" or "of all members" which made me giggle a little because I am 12.) and when the Ex- calls up and asks if I know when the Winter concert for Honors Chorus is, I hear "Pan-Sexual Bizarre" because it's just stuck in there.

And I always hear it said in Ron Howard's voice, which I don't think means anything because that was the voice I heard it in during the show, but I'm not shut to the idea that I might potentially be haunted by the ghost of some repressed,traumatic, pan-sexual memory from my childhood or maybe that's just the usual way people hear the words "pan-sexual bizarre" and I'm totally "normal".

So of course, I googled the words "pan-sexual" to see if the memory I'm repressing might be something awesome like being molested by a hot babysitter or something and the first thing it came up with was an article from Gawker about a guy who proclaimed himself to be pan-sexual. Wow. I had no idea you could do that. And that made me wonder if maybe there is like a pan-sexual dating service like Match.com, but then it occurred to me that pan-sexuals don't really need a dating service because being pan-sexuals they could just find a provocative-looking tree or something. And then I realized I was thinking about it too much and then my boss called and asked me for the results of the 10K benchmark thermal flow measurements and when I told him he said "That's bizarre."

(*cue Ron Howard*)


7 comments

Char said...

and you made me think of that song "how bizzare"...I hated that song.

Kurt said...

Not familiar with it. Sounds like I should be happy about that though.

Mandy's Kidding said...

Sounds like an orgy to me.

Jaimi said...

I have the same problem with "That's what she said".

Beth said...

Thank you for making me laugh! I mean, you almost always make me laugh but today I really needed it.

Cynthia said...

I loved Arrested Development. As a show. Not as a character trait. Just wanted to clarify. I also disliked that "how bizarre, how bizarre" song. One of those talking songs that makes you think, why does he get to be on the radio? He's not even singing.

Silly Swedish Skier Says So said...

I sometimes like getting these letters. Depends if its mightier-than-thou-braggart letter or just regular update.
I posted a discussion to write a Faux Family Letter on Blog Catalog. If you have any ideas you haven't used up, feel free to add on. I'd love it!